
April 27
First entry in the "explain the Times-Dispatch editorials contest" comes from Steve Wilson, who I'm really beginning to think is a genius:
It comes as no shock that the left-leaning wags at a local dot-com eyesore, whose purpose it is, apparently, to 'Save Richmond', should object to the content of the Richmond Times Dispatch editorial pages. For those who lament the passing of earlier, hallowed days when youth could be counted upon to respect their elders, such disingenuous affronts have become commonplacenay, the norm.
Champions of common sense, deft practitioners of the King's English, these editors, masters all of the rhetorical thrust-and-parry, the insightful barb, the pointed bon motsee their best efforts to inform, mayhap to enlighten, mocked in the virtual pages of a callow compyooter jockey's web-site. Sigh. 'Twas ever thus.
Hell, let's give up trying to explain it: Anyone who thinks they can write a better mock editorial (under 200 words) walks away with a big bag of advance CDs. Second prize: An even bigger bag!
April 27
While we're at it
Let's not forget these quotes, which basically got us started on this Save Richmond lark:
"[In my research], I found that the same cities with the worst unaddressed
infrastructure problems were spending money on other public projects. There
was money for some things but not others. What got funded depended on what
worked politically. Big, central-city projects with powerful backersspecifically stadiums, arenas, and convention centerswere happening
despite limited fiscal resources, and infrastructure repair was not.
The immediate proponents [of stadiums, convention centers, etc.] often are
hotel owners and Convention and Visitors Bureaus. But it's usually the big
boys, the major players in local business, who are really behind it. These
are people who have a tremendous amount of money invested in the entire
downtown area, and when the city's economy is doing poorly they're
desperately concerned that they could lose a good part of what they've put
into downtown. They may grab at anything that looks as though it might
preserve that investment, without thinking it through carefullyespecially if it'll be built with someone else's money. In those
circumstances, it can be very difficult to stop the project, because of the
incredible amount of money and resourcesand passionbehind it."
Heywood Sanders, Professor of Urban Studies in the Department of
Political Science at Trinity University in San Antonio, Texas, Buffalo
University Press interview
"The point is, this sense of having fun, being yourself, expressing yourself
fully, is valued. But as long as people continue to try to prop up the
downtowns, throwing money, burning money, by building stadiums and
convention centers, it's not going to happen. Cities have become cities of
ideas and cities of consumption. They are no longer cities of production,
and people in Detroit and Pittsburgh keep thinking, "We're going to have a
headquarters, we're going to have the stadium, mom and dad are going to come
from the suburbs and take little Johnny to the game, we're going to have
retail." That's just not what drives a city now. What drives a city we know
increasingly are good places to live, great neighborhoods, great cafes,
night life, places to have fun. Austin saw this from day one.
"A lot of cities believe that they'll make it in the new economy if they get
a professional sports team and build a downtown mall. They couldn't be more
wrong. It's almost like taking drugs away from an addict: No more stadiums.
No more convention centers. What cities need to do is really simple: Make it
fun. Create a music scene. Build bike lanes. Make sure that there are parks
where people can play Ultimate Frisbee. Think about the city's historic
assetsthe old buildingsas cool spaces for hot companies."
Dr. Richard Florida, Fast Company
April 27
Know thyself
Andrew writing: You know, if I wrote editorials for the Times-Dispatch, I wouldn't pick fights with editorial writers for any other paper except maybe a shopper's gazette here and there. But it's just this lack of self knowledge that makes these muddled, half-drunk observations one of the best forms of cheap entertainment in town (refugee friends in other cities find them kind of charming, which takes a generosity difficult to muster when you're living here). There's just so many weird things about these things: their dipshit "A-HA" tone; their use of elongated shorthand such as "DeeCee" and "teevee" for "D.C." and "TV," respectively; the odd entry that makes no sense whatsoever.
Can ANYONE shed light on how this situation became so intractable? I really want to talk to someone who thinks T-D editorials make sense. I'm not looking to pick a partisan fight here; it's not important to me whether you agree with their gist or not. I just hope to talk to someone who understands these thingsor at the very least can offer a theory as to why a newspaper of respectable size gives prime real estate to such bozosity. Seriously: Email me.
April 23
The real threat
Attention, city fathers! There is trouble, right here in River City! We're not talking about nightlife, with its "clubs whose goings-on and so-called music are better read about than experienced" or prickly and extremely weird police chiefs or even widespread government corruption. No, friends, there is a danger here in town, and that starts with "d" and that rhymes with "p" and that stands for...PIZZA.
Apparently the need to consume this vile pie is so all-consuming that it can lead to murder. Therefore we call upon the city council to take the only proper course: Impose the same scrutiny on pizza joints that we do on purveyors of so-called music. Require 60% of the sales of these so-called "pizza parlors" to be of Zweibecks or perhaps mushed carrotsany food that does not unavoidably stir the blood to violent actions (we know what garlic and tomatoes can do to passionsyou ever know any Mediterraneans? They're terribly excitable). Post an undercover police officer in every (in the parlance of our times) "crust shop" and inspect each one for code violationsactually, scratch that, get 'em on something elseand show no mercy to "dough dealers" who fail to meet these requirements. Shutter these modern opium dens once and for all, and put disreputable "sausage jockeys" out of business. We call on the council to IMMEDIATELY ban sales of pizza-by-the-slice and impose STRINGENT security requirements on buffets such as the one at the Pizza Hut on Wilkinson where further "last piece" riots could easily break out.
We call on the council to pass a law making it legal for police to stop Southern European-looking individuals and frisk them to make sure they aren't carrying dangerous circular cutting devices that may cause an unthreatening whole pie to be broken down into "pieces". And finally, we demand that the library system block websites that encourage virtual pizza consumption, as impressionable children may be exposed to them. We believe children are the future. Now, of course, we know the great majority of pizza makers are decent, God-fearing individuals who may even have licence plates that make clear their love for Jesus and who would never DREAM of breaking up a pie into instantly salable "slices" with a higher "street value." We've therefore formed a coalition called CRUST ("Creating Round, Undivided Southern Italian Treats"), to which we invite any responsible pizza owners who support these regulations to join and therefore weed out the "bad pepperonis" who are spoiling the whole bunch.
Take action now, and we will not forget come November. Stay idle and risk our wrath.
Want my money? Play better stuff, honey!
It's pledge time again at WCVE, which means that during All Things Considered and Fresh Air, pretty much the only goddamn times they're not playing classical warhorse pieces or dreary trad jazz, you have to listen to that "A Moment in Time" guy pleading for your spare change. One local business owner sent WCVE this letter when solicited for a sponsorship, and we thought it was good enough to post, along with a similar letter from another person frustrated by the one-dimensional offerings of our "public" radio station. Here's something some folks in Atlanta did when they got sick of a similar problemanyone up for another quixotic crusade, please get in touch.
HI Theresa,
I would be interested in becoming a corporate sponsor on WCVE if only for
the fact that 90% of your programming bores me to tears. One would be hard
pressed to find ANY NPR affiliate that plays more jazz and classical during
it's programming day than WCVE. There is nothing wrong with jazz and
classical music -- at all -- but by dedicating the gross amount of airtime
to these formats you really do not reflect the diversity of musical tastes
and culture that Richmond and Central Virginia is proud of.
I'm sorry to vent to you, but I cannot for the life of me find another email
address on the WCVE website, and wanted to make sure that the following
letter, sent by a friend with a donation, was read by someone important
there. Keep in mind -- your station is great, but being a "public" radio
station, it should reflect a more "public" stance -- do you not agree?
Please see the following to understand how many, many people in the region
feel the exact same way.
Thank you for your time.
Erik
--
Erik Grotz
Extensive Consulting Group, Inc.
http://www.extensivegroup.com
I am submitting my pledge of support for your station because it is arguably
the only worthwhile station in Richmond. That, however, is not saying much.
In a perfect world, I imagine your programming is meant to reflect the
public and population which supports it. However, of the 24 hours in a day,
11 of your weekday programming hours are dedicated to classical programming. Another 11 for
news programming, and 2 for jazz. Weekends are slightly better with the
recent addition of This American Life (although you've buried it in your
schedule for Sunday morning). The weekends also contain TWO airings of A
Prairie Home Companion and TWO airings of Car Talk. While I appreciate the
popularity of these two shows, I would also argue shows such as TAL, jazz,
and The Sound of Swing could also benefit from the same preferential
treatment.
The classical programming on your station feels much more like a ethical and
ideological obligation than a celebration of art.
The rare times I am able to listen to jazz, blues, and swing (I will avoid
even mentioning other genres since I am convinced that would fruitless) in
this town on the radio are cherished moments for me, and I imagine they
would be welcomed too by the ever growing population of 20, 30, and
40-somethings. This demographic is also proving quite adept at finding the
programming they're craving locally on the internet. I personally listen to
a handful of different stations on-line during the work day (during your
classical programming), and all of them ARE PUBLIC STATIONS from other
cities... all of whom I am a financial contributor to.
Richmond has a long and storied history of establishments censoring
THEMSELVES because they assume their patrons (read: people with the money)
fit into a stereotypical ideal of old conservative Richmonders -- the image
of which reads: old, white, conservative, christian, wealthy. This may well
be true of the primary supporters of your station at this time (I have
looked at the names on your
Board of Directors), but I would venture to say that if your neglected audience was made to feel
as though their interests and voices were just as important as those with
more money, you might find this audience just as capable of meeting your
financial goals if not surpassing them.
I feel there is a time and place for classical music, and I am aware that
the time and place for it in Richmond will always be "most of the time"
on WCVE. I am also aware that the tone of this letter might be slightly
antagonistic, so I will remind you that your station is superior to any in
town.
I would love to see WCVE develop local programming in line with Virginia
Currents. I would love to see WCVE support music of all types and people of
all types. I have seen WCVE moving in a positive direction recently, and I
can only hope that continues, and I sincerely hope it accelerates.
April 21
Leadership exemplified
The below message from you was forwarded to me today. It appears that your correspondence is in response to Ray McAllister's column in today's Times-Dispatch. It is obvious that you, like Mr. McAllister, are not fully aware of the requirements directing units of government and educational intuitions to report crimes which occur in their jurisdictions or on their property. While I recognize that you are "shocked" and "appalled", you should know that the appropriate procedures were followed by both the Richmond Police Department and the VCU Police Department following the tragic death of the Virginia State University student last week. In the future I hope you will take time to familiarize yourself with the appropriate procedures, policies and laws which govern crime reporting before accusing me of "gross abrogation" of my duties and questioning my leadership. Also, you should know that the Richmond Police Department homicide detectives are handling this investigation at the request of the VCU Police Department. Lastly, I have attached a copy of a letter sent to Mr. McAllister today informing him of the requirements and duty to report crime by law enforcement agencies. I hope this will be informative to you as well.
And to think we considered Chief Andre Parker "unresponsive"! The letter to which he refers wasn't even addressed to him; it went to his public relations department. (A PDF of both emails is here.)
Parker's right: We don't know much about the commonwealth's regulations for uniform crime reporting. As citizens, we kind of leave that stuff to the police. But we do know what a clearance rate is, and we know that Parker's is not good. The murder in question took place at 1:20 a.m. on April 11. Jose Andujar was driving down West Broad Street in his red Ford Explorer when someone walked up to his car, put a gun to his head, and fired. His car continued forward, stopping partially on the sidewalk at the corner of West Broad and Pine Streets.
According to Parker, this is a crime that occurred on VCU property, because VCU owns the parking lot at West Broad and Pine. Not City property, such as West Broad Street, where Andujar was, you know, shot, but VCU property because that's where his car ended up. Anyway, what does it matter if VCU gets the homicide case, because the Richmond PD is conducting the investigation on VCU's behalf?
It matters because this murder won't be counted against Parker if it's not solved. It matters because it's a judgment call. It matters because it's a human being who was killed doing something we all take for granted: driving down a city street. Parker can fulminate all he wants about "appropriate procedures"the appropriate procedure in this case is to take some damn responsibility.
Though perhaps that would cut into the time he apparently has to berate citizens who question his leadership.
April 20
A man in full
We could all learn something from Joe Kennedy Jr., who died Saturday. A master of jazz violin, Kennedy was a musical omniphage who loved classical, folk, blues, and whatever he could get his hands on. In a rare moment of clarity, Richmond made him the city schools' supervisor for music, art, and humanities. He was the first black member of the Richmond Symphony and by all accounts (Don was lucky enough to interview him; we'll post that interview if he can find it) a heck of a nice guy.
Also, we gotta give a shoutout to Clarke Bustard for writing a fine appreciation of Kennedy that emphasizes the man's philosophy: "there isn't just any one type of music that should be taught and learned." In our fractured burg, that's a lesson that we all need to remember.
An outrage: If you get shot on a city street, and you have the misfortune to stagger onto VCU property as you expire, guess who's gonna be investigating your murder? Richmond police, you say? WRONG. In a move straight out of season 2 of The Wire, Richmond has passed the buck on murder No. 29 to the VCU police department. You know, the people who write parking tickets and break up parties (and in one memorable instance, threatened to arrest Andrew for wandering out onto the roof of the Business Building when he was in college, even though the dang door was unlocked, telling him, "Common sense should have told you it was illegal." Pfft). VCU has no experience investigating homicides, but one less homicide means a higher clearance rate for the feckless Richmond PD, which big-heartedly has promised, through what one can only assume is a cheese-eating grin, to "assist" the investigation.
This is worth doing: Email the police department's public affairs office and tell them you think this stinks. Copy your councilperson on the email (unless you live in the 9th district, in which case your former councilwoman has a more direct route to communicating with the police). It'll take you five minutes and maybe if enough people do this, the department won't pull this crap again.
April 16
Go yellow
Andrew writing: Man I have got to give it up for the Clean and Safe program. The three of you who read my blog might be aware that for the past two weeks, my trusty $50 Magna bicycle has been marooned on Main Street near the Gutenberg, where its lock froze. I mentioned this to someone who has a whole lot more juice than I knew, and she whipped out her cell phone. Thirty minutes later, a guy appeared with a truck and a ladder, and proceeded to dismantle the sign and help me lift my bike over it (we reassembled the sign, talked about some that we'd like to take down instead, and then went our separate ways). The lock's still on the frame (anyone with access to a blowtorch, please drop me a line), but my primary daytime transportation has been returned to me, and I am so grateful.
Thank you, Everett, for rescuing my bike. And thank you, Lucy Meade, for making that call.
And now a retreat to form: This week's Media Notes.
Hey Ray! Nice piece on the newspaper's advertising campaign!
The air's polluted, and so's the James.
Richmond music equals Carbon Leaf and Susan Greenbaum, which, if I'm not mistaken, was Melissa Ruggieri's take on Richmond music in 2003. And 2002. And 2001. And so on. Also, working the phrase "an extra swipe of deodorant" into an entertainment preview really calls for a Virginia Press Award.
Finally, another stunning critical insight from Daniel Neman
: "When you pour a glass from a bottle of fine wine, the taste can be exquisite. When you pour a second glass, the bottle is just as good, but there is less of it." That can be so true!
April 14
Switchin' to decaf
That last entry was a little harsh. Sorry.
April 13
News from the donut hole
Among the Top 50 best cities in Frommer's new edition of Cities Ranked and Rated:
- 1. Charlottesville, VA
- 11. Roanoke, VA
- 15. Lynchburg, VA
- 17. Norfolk-Virginia Beach-Newport News, VA-NC
- 26. Washington, DC-MD-VA-WV
Something's missing here, let's see...it's...
US! EVERY OTHER GODDAMN PLACE IN VIRGINIA IS RATED OVER RICHMOND! Today was not totally without good news on that front; some nonprofit something or other included Richmond in its list of livable cities. Well, I don't know what kind of travel guide you reach for when you go on vacation, but I don't tend to opt for the one published by Partners for Livable Communities. And I'm pissed--PISSED!--that we're living in such a donut hole. Seriously, it's, like, only us and Emporia that didn't make the Frommer's list.
The things that matter, according to Frommer's:
economy and jobs
- cost of living
- climate
- education
- arts and culture
Well, the climate's usually pretty good here. And housing's still relatively cheap. Besides that, though, the government's completely cuckoo, and it thinks Barber's "Adagio for Strings" equals "trendy arts scene," and the newspaper's an embarrassment, and the murder rate's out of control, and the school system could probably only be improved with gasoline and matches, and the state government's out of money and Circuit City is in trouble....
But other than that, livable. Some people make the best of the donut holes. At Dunkin they call them "Munchkins." We look forward to comments from the Richmond Munchkins Society.
We close with a video everyone should see at least once.
April 2
P.S.
This is completely hilarious.
April 2
Back in charge!
After working all night (gracias, Cafe Bustelo!), Don and Andrew were able to wrest back control of the saverichmond.com from the hackers who defaced it. We're keeping an archive of the attack up as a reminder of what happens if you're not carefulfor example, Andrew's now pledged to make sure he's got his list of FTP passwords with him when he crawls out of Acapella.
ANYWAY, back to business. This morning's Washington Post (you don't subscribe?) has an interesting article about Philadelphia's efforts to reverse its brain drain. You're probably thinking, "Gee, isn't Philadelphia alone roughly eight billion times the size of RIchmond? Isn't it close to New York City, doesn't it have excellent public transportation and isn't it a major cultural center in its own right (and isn't it, in fact, hosting the new Real World, something that would never happen here in a decazillion years)? If Philadelphia is losing young, educated people, what does that mean for our creepy, sleepy burg?"
That all may be true, but Philadelphia and Richmond have some similar problems. As the article says: "The region is lagging in employment growth, new business starts and overall economic expansion...putting the nation's fifth-largest city squarely in the ranks of second-tier knowledge centers, behind such cities as Boston, San Francisco and the Raleigh-Durham area."
Behind Raleigh? Ouch! (Of course, we're behind Charlotte, so be kind). So let's look at what Philadelphia's doing. Innovation Philadelphia, a public-private partnership that strives to bring technology firms to town, is attempting to create 5,000 internships so college students connect with local businesses. Another public-private, the Knowledge Industry Partnership, is striving to create an "emotional attachment" between students and local employers.
And then there's the question of non-work life. From the article: "Jobs may be first on the list, but an appealing social life is a close second for many graduates considering where to live, said Jon Herrmann, general manager of Campus Philly, which operates a Web site listing entertainment and social activities geared to young adults. The goal is to draw students away from campus fraternity parties and beer kegs and get them to know Philadelphia as place to work and play."
Activities. Play. The kind of thing young people are interested in. Not the kinds of things a bunch of retired businessmen in their 60s think young people like.
Can you see the difference in our two cities' approaches? You will in a few years.
News/blog archives
February/March 2004
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July 2003